Counting down to London (and beyooooonnnndddd)

The countdown begins. My excitement builds. I really love travelling and I haven't been to London in years. (By the way, the photo to the left, like many of the photos in my blog, is not mine. I got it from the very funny site Spud's Travels for which I, and my file sharing little ass, can now apologize profusely.)

There are some people who don't do much travel outside of this country and, snob that I am, I just don't get it. I consider it essential for anyone who really wants to understand the world and their place in it. The cliche of the Ugly American is all about people who consider themselves and their way of being to be the only real way. Now, honestly, in most cases I don't think people do that to be self-centered or consciously close-minded. Nope, I think they do it because they just can't imagine a world that's different than theirs. They just can't figure out how people can get along without air conditioners set at 62 degrees, or a choice of fifty different underarm deodorants.

You get the idea.

The cure for Ugly Americanism (no matter which country's citizens practice it) is simply to keep the learning coming.

And that is why I'm really excited to be embarking on this great adventure.

To reiterate -- one week in London, three weeks in Jordan, one week in Chicago, and a half a week or so in New York State. I'll be a very exhausted and very happy camper when I come back (so long as I don't really have to do any camping). I'll also be much savvier about other cultures and other peoples. And that is what is even more exciting.

Is there anyone out there who is afraid of travelling or just plain and simple doesn't like it?

Flying Off To Rio (or not)

I just got my ticket for my England/Jordan trip (for which I promise to blog and upload photos as much as technology will allow -- so be prepared to be bored). Now, I don't want to sound prissy or anything, but they changed my ticket from a series of direct flights (from LAX to Heathrow, then direct to AMman, then direct back to LAX). Now I get to go through fucking Charles DeGaulle airport in Paris each and every time I get on the plane. So, it's LAX to Paris and then to London. London to Paris and then Amman. Amman to Paris and then LAX.

Are you seeing the pattern here?

I don't want to seem spoiled, since this could be the absolute best travel in my life that I haven't paid for, but when I called to get back onto my direct flights I was politely informed by the woman at Air France that all of their flights between countries must fly though Paris, whether it makes sense or not.

That makes sense, doesn't it.

So maybe I'll blog a little while I sitting on my can for three hours at DeGaulle.

C'est la vie!! C'est la gurerre!!

Fighting

Tamara, over at the must-read blog T&A, has an entry today in which she talks about the odd way that people fight (which is really the same thing as saying that she has a blog entry about how she fights, but never mind that).

It seems to me that most fights are all about old shit and about how our parents used to fight or how we used to fight with our siblings. And they're often not really about what it is that we're fighting about, but what happened with that person in the past (earlier that day, last week, last year...) or what happened with someone else that day.

Anger seems to me to be really about fear, so fights are also about being afraid of something. A lot of people fight about money. Others fight about sex. Still other fight about their kids, or their parents. Many people fight about all three.

What happens to you when you really fight? Do you get out of control or is it a simmering, steaming anger that can be even scarier?

Hard Hats Required -- Brains Optional

Those of you whose brains are still on "drive" may remember this post about morons at USC. Here's another story for the same category.

Strolling through campus this afternoon, I noticed that the folks who are reworking one of the dorm's exteriors have kindly put a sign up for all of the people who are "handicaped" to help guide them to the proper entrance to the building. I assume that this includes those who are physically handicapped. For all of those who are mentally handicapped, there is another sign -- "Caution. Hard Hats Required" -- to the left of the larger sign.

Maybe their brains are exploding out through their hard hats.

Provided Without Comment -- sorta

Not that I'm making any value judgements here, but these two ads appeared on top of one another in the LA Times leading me to question whether Will and Nicole are coming out or going in.

But I'll never again question the wisdom, fortitude and humor quotient of the tireless ad slaves at Otis Chandler's great newspaper.

[Can't wait to see if Ferrell's agent calls and objects.]

Live 8 Crazies

My daughter has decided that since both Pink Floyd and what remains of the Sex Pistols will be playing at Live 8 the date that we arrive in London (July 2nd) that we must, MUST, MUST go there.

Not sure how to scam tickets for a concert that happens several hours after we arrive, without paying eight gazillion dollars (or, in this case, eight gazillion pounds) but any and all advice will gratefully be taken so I can attain true godliness in her eyes.

T-minus a ridiculously low amount

There are people, I am sure, who plan ahead and pack and get all of their affairs in order before going on a long trip. There are people who organize their pre-travel needs into separate to-do lists and then methodically check off each one as they complete.

I am not one of those people.

I spend enormous amounts of time thinking ahead in the editing room and as a professor, planning and planning for every eventuality (except for the ones that actually happen of course). That all falls apart as soon as I get home.

So, I'm leaving for Europe a week from Friday and I have to start thinking of planning. Not planning, but thinking of planning. Much better.

3% of All Europeans/Africans (or whatever)Like This Blog

Dipping into my site statistics (which you can do by clicking on the Site Meter block on the left) is amusing today. A good 80% of the readers of this blog come from this time zone (I'm assuming that that's my computer). A little over 15% come from the East Coast, which is puzzling because I haven't told my mother about this.

And about 3% come from the time zone that seems to include (if the report can be deciphered properly) central Europe or parts of Algeria, Nigeria and Togo. A huge outpouring of support from the African and European continents (maybe). Those of you from that area, please raise your hands.

[UPDATE!! UPDATE!! UPDATE!!] The fun thing about a dynamically driven site like Site Meter, is that it changes. As of 4:00pm on Tuesday the 21st of June, that Algerian visitor that I mentioned above has completely, totally, absolutely, plain-up-and-disappeared.

Defamer Defames Star Wars

Today's Defamer wraps up the weekend box office and has this to say about two of your favorite films (actually, you may remember, I liked STAR WARS, so slap me stupid about this)

4. Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith—$9.7 million
Fun fact: ROTS has brought in $347.8 million at the domestic box office. Will it ever catch The Phantom Menace ($431 million)? Mmm…maybe not. This would make George Lucas sad if he hadn’t uploaded all of his human emotions into a mainframe at Industrial Light & Magic, and then had that computer destroyed.

5. The Longest Yard—$8 million
Much more interesting is the bombing of Hilary Duff’s The Perfect Man, which finished seventh with an anemic $5.5 million. To celebrate, rival Lindsay Lohan’s going to skip five consecutive meals.

Defamer is, of course, the daily blog that likes to get catty about everything having to do with Hollywood. It's actually more of a guilty pleasure than STAR WARS.

The War Comes Home

Tamara, over at T&A, had a link to this post from Miss Doxie, which I had to pass along. Let me give you a warning first; despite it's wonderfully loose start, it's really a post about Iraq and the war there.

I remember during the Vietnam war, most of us who opposed it just couldn't figure out why the rest of the country thought the war was such a damned good thing Well, it's deja vu all over again.

You must go over and read this post. Then I defy you to tell me that this war is worth winning. The worst that could happen would be for us to ignore what's going on. So long as people don't talk about this, and so long as Bush is allowed to stop the press from showing pictures of coffins coming home, and so long as we seriously really really believe that it's better to be there than not be there...

well... there will be plenty more families and friends who will have to reconcile their memories of life with the realities of death.

I wish we could skywrite this story over Washington DC and all of the we-love-Bush states. Because I'm still wondering just what the hell is so good about this war.

Plus ca change and all that.

I Am My Own Wife

This Pulitzer winning play, I AM MY OWN WIFE, is playing at the Wadsworth up at UCLA and the family trotted over to see it last night. It's an interesting tour de force, the type that audiences (myself included) really like -- one guy plays 35 characters (though most of them are minor -- there are about four or five major characters).

The subject matter might be a little tough for some -- a transvestite antique collector tries to move through Nazi Germany and, later, the East German government (two of the most repressive regimes of all time, according to the play).

Jeffrey Mays is great as most of those characters, and it's great to see live theatre, especially if you're a filmmaker type and spend most of your time with performances that are frozen in time.

Pirated Copy of STAR WARS Rewrites Dialogue

The often hilarious blog, DEFAMER, has an article in which they post the picture that appears on the left here, which is allegedly a photo off of a pirated (Chinese) copy of the latest STAR WARS film. You know the type -- available on Canal Street or Santee Alley. Last year, when I was in NYC, I actually bought one (ETERMANAL SUNSHINE) to see what they were like. It was hilarious, shot with a videocam from about half way back in the theatre. The image came complete with people chatting around the cameraman, and a few people getting up and going to the bathroom, when they hadn't a clue as to why anyone would want to watch the film. [That strikes me as a good first date question: If they didn't understand and love the film, send them away. Same for MEMENTO.]

In any case, DEFAMER had the following comment about the translation provided on the pirated film. As they put it:

You’ve long suspected it, but now there’s proof: Chinese DVD pirates write much better dialogue than George Lucas.

This may not be that interesting to you. But it's a hell of a lot more interesting, I suppose, than my last rant about Terry Schiavo (judging by the complete lack of comments).

Put This Controversy To Rest

A news article today says that the autopsy on Terry Schiavo, the 41 year old woman who became the focus of yet another stupid news circus when the Bush administration got involved in trying to prolong her life against the wishes of her husband, proves that her husband acted in her best interests all along.

Actually, that's not exactly how the autopsy read. But it did agree with everything that her husband and doctors said about her, and contradicted everything that Bush, Schiavo's parents, and the rabid right-wing media had to say about the case.

• There was no bodily harm to her.
• She had not been poisoned.
• Most importantly, her brain was 50% the size of a normal human brain and she would never, NEVER have recovered. In other words, she was in a "persistent vegetative state" just like her doctors said.

"Her brain was profoundly atrophied," [the medical examiner] said. "This damage was irreversible."

Sometimes, we're not complete morons who need to be led around by our religious leaders who know so much better. Sometimes, a husband does know his wife's health and desires.

Don't Even Bother To Click This If You're NOT A Parent

So here's the deal. I know that not everyone thinks that everything that babies do is cute. In fact, not even I think that. And, like boring slide shots of friends' vacations, most of us would rather sit through a slowed-down rerun of MEET JOE BLACK than hear baby stories.

That having been said, Heather Armstrong (creator of the fantastic blog Dooce) has a story today about her, her father, her husband and her daughter's inability to poop that I just had to share with you.

WARNING: Do not click on that link if you think that baby stories need to be used soley for the abuse of political prisoners or mass murderers. But, if you're me (or Jeremy, perhaps) click away.

[And the MEET JOE BLACK reference -- well, those of you who know me, will know what I'm talking about.]

Illiteracy At CollegeorHow Do You Spell "USC"???

Last year the Parking Lot Administration People, in their attempt to ease the horrible parking here at USC, decided to use one side of a number of the aisles in some of the parking lots for smaller cars only. In order to make this clear to the users and purveyors of higher education here, they painted the "NO SUV" signs on the floors of each of the parking spaces along those walls.

The success rate of this project can be seen in the photos here.

Is it that the users and purveyors can't read? Is it that they don't give a shit? Is it that the Parking Lot Administration People need to put up neon signs?

Or could it be that they need to enforce it?

The White Gloved Man Is Free

Free at last, free at last, thanks to the jury I'm free at last.

'Nuff said. In a world where people are dying in Darfur and we're not going to have any health care system soon, I promise never ever to mention this embarrassing trial again.

Ever.

Guilty Pleasure

I'm sorry. I know it's stupid and obvious and glorifies all that is evil in the world, but I still like Entourage, the show about how vapid Marky Mark and his friends were when he turned into Rich and Famous Mark Wahlberg.

Everyone's favorite character, agent Ari Gold, last night declined a party invitation because "It's anal sex night at the Gold house" and then later got angry at another character for badmouthing his wife.

The writing is just too sassy for words. My words at least. I always love watching this show (especially as the characters grow into their roles -- a real advantage of episodic tv). I just end up hating myself in the morning.

Let Me Flip All of The Cards Over...

If I've gotten the pictures in there properly then you should have guessed, by now, that the mysterious country that Tamara has been trying to guess for the last week or two (or three) is Jordan. Beginning July 8th I'll be teaching in Amman for about three weeks, as part of a new series of classes that the newly formed Jordanian Film Commission is setting up. It's part of an incredibly busy summer that will see me zip to four and a half different cities in three different countries in six weeks.

Quite the world traveller aren't I?

For fun (and a few business meetings) I'll be heading to London (in merrie olde England) on July 1 (I absolutely must stop dropping parenthetical expressions in so regularly) (soon).

This trip is mostly vacation and a sort of congratulatory trip for my daughter's high school graduation (made all the easier by the fact that someone else is paying for my flight) (and there are those damned parentheses again) (damn!!). We'll spend a week there and then I'll zip onto Amman to start teaching the next day. It will be a kind of 290/507, which only people who have been through the USC Film program will know what I'm talking about. When I finish at the end of July, I'll come back for two days and then head out to a conference in Chicago where I'm speaking on several panels. This will be followed by a bit less than a week in New York (NYC and Annandale-on-Hudson) to drop my daughter off at college.

After that, starting school here in mid-August will seem like a dream!

I'm really looking forward to this since I've never been in that part of the world. It will great for me and, I hope, good for both the Jordanian students and (at some point in the future, when I get out of these parentheses) for USC students, who might get a chance to do some exchange program work there.

Hopefully, I'll be able to keep blogging (I can hear a number of you pleading for dial-up only in my hotel) so you can see some of what I see.

How Not To Be A Suited Idiot On A Film Set

Peggy Archer, who works on Hollywood lighting crews and does the great Total Authorized blog (which, as of today, will be on my list o'links) wrote a guest blog entry for Atlas' blog Assistant/Atlas. [Are we following the chain here?].

This entry, How Not To Be A Suited Idiot On Set, basically is a very valid gripe session about the things that people who know absolutely nothing about film production do when they're on film sets. I think that many of you will recognize the problems (and, I might add, they also can apply to editors who don't spend time on sets -- pay attention folks!!)

3. If you take a picture and are using the flash on your camera, please say "Flashing" loudly - before you take the picture. A camera flash looks exactly like a light bulb blowing out, and if the electricians see the flash of white light and don't know that's what it is, they'll go batty trying to find the blown out globe when it was your camera. This is funny, but very, very mean.
12. Don't stand in front of a light. Feel that heat on your back? It means you're casting a shadow onto the set. Don't walk in front of a light, either. On a related note.. if you can look into the camera lens, you're in the shot.
14. If you don't know what something is, don't touch it.
14a. Don't plug anything in ANYWHERE without asking first. DC power (which some stages still have) will do a number on your cell phone charger, and if you didn't ask before plugging it in, we'll laugh at you.

And that's just a sample.

Haloscan Comments Added but....

I've switched to Haloscan commenting which, for many of you, won't mean very much. Let's keep it that way.

The main effect of this seems to be that all of your old comments have disappeared.

Sorry about that. Start commenting all over again. Okay?

Ragazze Medie

According to Babel Fish (the occasionally accurate web translation service) that is Italian for MEAN GIRLS. And last night I went to see the film CATERINA IN THE CITY, or CATERINA GOES TO THE CITY -- as it is called on the title card.

It's got some of the MEAN GIRLS flavor to it.

CATERINA is a movie about a 12 or 13 year old Italian girl from the boondocks, who moves to Rome when her socially star-struck father teacher is transferred there. He places her in the school he went to when he was a kid and Caterina is immediately swept up in the stark social intrigue of the school -- caught in between the goths and the preppie girls.

This film, though simplistic, is really alot of fun and rides on the very capable shoulders of the girl who plays Caterina, Alice Teghil. It's a film that could easily have degenerated into clichés and though there are plenty here, Teghil really makes us see past them and care about her. It's more "heightened realism" than "neorealism."

There are several very funny performances, especially Sergio Castellitto, as Caterina's pompous father, who has stars in his eyes for the Caterina's friends' famous parents but who ultimately comes to realize that all of them share a common bond -- their fame insulates them from understanding the common people.

It's fun. It's touching. It's [fill in your critic-whore adjective here].

Time For Another War!!!

This graph, from the Washington Post, shows Bush's approval ratings since February 2001. The latest polls (not that they've been particularly reliable but -- hell -- they're always entertaining) show his ratings almost at their lowest ebb ever.

That means, according to graph, that it's time for another war!!! When the numbers were plummeting, he went into Afghanistan and then Iraq. Whoops. getting close to 50% again, so let's go find Saddam!

The funniest item in the graph, by the way, is the flag at May 1, 2003 which tagged "End of Hostilities." Someone needs to tell that to the hundreds of Iraqi, Americans and others who have died or been maimed since then.

Here's Where I'm Going In July

Here's where I'm going in July. It looks 99.9999999% sure (so I've now jinxed it of course).

I will be teaching a class with two other USC professors on storytelling, sort of like the 290/507 here at USC, except with one and a half films crammed into three weeks. More details as they become available.

And, no, I didn't forget to tell you the name of the country/city. I still want to keep Tamara guessing (Happy Aunt-hood Tamara!!! by the way).

What NOT To Do On A First Date

Todd Levin, owner of the often hilarious blog TREMBLE, had an entry the other day in which he talks about overhearing a first date conversation between a guy and a woman who, I judge, is much his superior. These are some of the most hilarious dating rules I've ever read and makes me glad that I'm an old married guy who doesn't have to worry about such stuff.

The Funniest Saddest Music

I don't know why, but I find this short film, on the IFC Web Site, one of the funniest weirdnesses ever.

Something must be seriously wrong with me. Just don't tell me what it is. Send an email to my shrink.

Thanks. This has been a public service announcement from your friends at the Department of Redundancy Department.

HBO Comes Roaring Out of the Gate

Both ENTOURAGE and THE COMEBACK started up last night on HBO, taxing my Tivo which was trying to "tape" Family Guy at the same time. And while I think ENTOURAGE was passable (it was never a great show but had a guilty pleasure sort of feel to it, thanks to the great ensemble acting) the new LIsa Kudrow series was a perfect example of why it's better that Larry David keep doing what he's doing and let the rest of the world avoid making terrible copies of his concept.

THE COMEBACK stars Kudrow as Valerie Cherish, a past star of a hit television comedy (stop me if you're gagging yet) who is looking to get her career going again. Despite the fact that this seems like an entire series stolen from a single episode of CURB YOUR ENTHUSIASM, it's also a warning signal for those people who think that just because you're an actor/actress who's been on a successful show that you've got the talent to write and produce something else. You don't. Especially if you're going to be starring in it.

This is a show that, in the fifteen minutes that I was able to sit through it (I have to admit that I bailed half way into it) followed Kudrow/Cherish as she talked endlessly to the camera. You see, the set-up is that she's in a reality show about her doing the new series. So... (stop me when this gets too boring) THE COMEBACK is a television show that is about an actress who's doing a fictional reality show about a ficitional television sitcom. You can just see the series creator dropping Charlie Kaufman's name into the pitch every thirty seconds.

The problem with this show (as with the equally execrable FAT ACTRESS) is that the leads just aren't very interesting and they've put themselves in the middle of a few (very very few) supporting characters who are, if possible, even less interesting. Kirstie Alley had two sycophantic personal aides. Kudrow has a hairdresser and probably some other idiotic sidekick-type people who I would have discovered if I could have stomached watching another 15 minutes of the show.

But if you take a look at how CURB and ENTOURAGE work (as well as every reality show out there) there are normally LOTS of people on the show, all of whom have varying degrees of their own personalities that don't necessarily revolve around the lead. On ENTOURAGE, it's hard to tell who's the lead. And that's not a bad thing. And while CURB revolves around Larry David, many of the other characters don't seem to notice -- they think it's about them. And that's not a bad thing either.

The writing is also a million times better on CURB than on any other show of its kind.

Of course Kudrow (who is executive producer along with former Sex And The City executive Michael Patrick King) won't change any of these things because you can tell by the way she hangs on shots w-a-a-a-y after they've made their point, that she thinks that she's being very very funny at the same time that she's making a very valuable point about Hollywood (Lord save us from well-meaning but incredibly over-insulated stars). Who cares if it gets boring. The hell with the audience attention span.

As another example, there's a running gag where Kudrow makes the "time-out" signal again and again to the reality show producer, despite the fact that we've been told that there's no time out when you shoot reality television (uh huh, you bet). Again and again. It wasn't funny the first time and, despite the conceit that some comedy works through repetition, it never gets any better.

There's also the tone deaf dialogue. At one point, coming into a waiting room for an audition, she spots Marilu Henner who's there for the same role. Henner looks at Kudrow and says something like "Valerie!! Wow. Who's going to be next? Valerie Bertinelli?" The repetition of the name "Valerie" is pointless and stupid.

So... how much did I like THE COMEBACK? Tonight, I'm watching SIX FEET UNDER, and I'm going to go into it pissed off at HBO.

Travel Plans, Part 2

And, no, I'm not going here either. Nope.

You'll have to guess again.

USC and the Big Big List

Mike Gerber, over at mikegerber.com apparently has a spouse who is coming to USC Film School (no idea which division) next semester. She recently received a list of a ton of films that we apparently recommend incoming students see. There are 149 narrative feature films, 26 documentaries, and 15 television shows.

Do we really hand out such a list? It's a pretty good one and I'd encourage everyone to read the list and see a ton of the movies (but Arthur Penn's NIGHT MOVES??). And it's got RIDING GIANTS on it, which pretty much rates.

It's not a perfect list, of course. There's no Eisenstein on the list and the list seems to like Kurasawa a lot but no Kirostami. It's got HOUSE OF SAND AND FOG (a film which stumbled badly on the Hollyn Interest-ometer, despite Ben Kingsley and the ever wonderful Jennifer Connelly) but not 1900 or THE CONFORMIST. It is, at least in the doc world, a pretty recent bunch of films. And there are virtually no experimental or avant garde films unless you count Bergman and REPO MAN in that category (which I don't). LA JETEE maybe.

Still, as a way to plant our flag on the mountain of popular films, this isn't a bad list. Has someone been giving this out for years, and I just haven't realized it?

Music, Kids, Adorable, Cool, WEIRD

Pancake Mountain is a kids television show out of Washington D.C. which looks pretty cool. Check out their web page and look at the four year old kids playing drums with The Arcade Fire and the little guys pogo-ing with Shonen Knife.

Scroll down a little bit and watch Anti-Flag do a great performance without kids.

But the real winner has to be the kids shakin' their booty to Weird War's "Why Do Guys Like Girls Like That?" It's bizarre watching four year olds shimmy around the dance floor. Who teaches them to do this stuff? And why? It makes the true archness of AMERICAN BANDSTAND seem like stone age entertainment. This shit is positively bizarre!!!

Where will these kids be in ten years?

Travel Plans

Nope, not here

Nope, not here either

I don't want to jinx it, but it looks like I may be doing some exciting teaching work in a faraway country in the month of July.

Actually, no matter what, I'll be vacationing in London in the first week of July (the better to miss the Independence Day craziness, my dear), and then travelling on to the mysterious destination.

I've spent way too many years in this freelance business, and as a result, I get very superstitious about talking about gigs before I've officially landed them. So, I'm going to shut my mouth right about now. As soon as I get my airplane tickets I'll consider it a done deal and will talk about it. But I'm officially excited about visiting a new culture and learning new things.

Stay tuned for more.

STAR WARS Sucks, Anthony Lane, He Thinks

There is nothing funnier (and sadder at the same time) than a film critic who unsheathes his "humor pen" to slam a movie that he/she thinks blows chunks.

Anthony Lane, in THE NEW YORKER, rips into STAR WARS with the same avid relish that a jackal rips into the carcass of an animal that he has just killed. Lane does just think this movie was bad, he feels that he needs to destroy it with his complete cleverness. In the process, he unleashes humor that Jay Leno would be hard pressed to control. After spending a few too many sentences trashing Lucas' naming of people and species (he especially doesn't like the name "Sith") he proceeds to trash plotlines.

Meanwhile, the Chancellor of the Republic, Palpatine (Ian McDiarmid), is engaged in a sly bout of Realpolitik, suspected by nobody except Anakin, Obi-Wan, and every single person watching the movie. Anakin, too, is a divided figure, wrenched between his Jedi devotion to selfless duty and a lurking hunch that, if he bides his time and trashes his best friends, he may eventually get to wear a funky black mask and start breathing like a horse.

He then makes the general proclamation about the relative merits of this film amongst the STAR WARS hierarchy:

The general opinion of “Revenge of the Sith seems to be that it marks a distinct improvement o the last two episodes, “The Phantom Menace” and “Attack of the Clones.” True, but only in the sam way that dying from natural causes is preferable to crucifixion. So much here is guaranteed to caus either offense or pain, starting with the nineteen-twenties leather football helmet that Natalie Portma suddenly dons for no reason, and rising to th continual horror of Ewan McGregor’s accent. “Another happy landing”—or, to be precise, “anothah heppy lending”—he remarks, as Anakin parks the front half of a burning starcruiser on convenient airstrip.

Later on, he gets off a barb at the manner in which Yoda talks (he obviously hasn't been playing around on any STAR WARS web sites, which are full of funny gags about this):

Also, while we’re here, what’s with the screwy syntax? Deepest mind in the galaxy, apparently, and you still express yourself like a day-tripper with a dog-eared phrase book. “I hope right you are.” Break me a fucking give.

It's funny, really funny. Not fair, at times, but comedy isn't pretty, as they say. Sometimes, it's downright nasty. And (to be honest) even though I liked the film, many of Lane's points hit the mark (though he does make his points a little less valid by the vigor of his venom).

And, with that alliterative flourish, I sign off for the night.